10 Ways to Give Yourself Grace When it Comes to Motherhood

This blog is all about motherhood. And I’m not talking about the picture-perfect view of motherhood that the media likes to feed us. I'm talking about the messiest, most beautiful, and most difficult job you'll ever have. Here are ten things to remember in order to give yourself grace when it comes to being a mom. 

Sharing your real motherhood story is important.

Social media has made it so easy to filter and edit our lives so that the people around us only see the good. It sounds like the right thing to do to share positive experiences and put-together photos of our families, but is that really all that the world needs right now? I think that we need a little more authenticity. I think that the mom community needs to be able to look around them and see that if they are struggling, they are not alone. So share your real story. Share your ups and your downs. Not only is this good for you and your kids, but it is good for those you are sharing with. 

Motherhood is a lot of highs and lows, sometimes at the same time.

The other day, mom guilt hit me hard. My kids had been watching movies all day long, the house was a mess, and I felt like I couldn’t get on top of anything. Just when I’d hit my low, my two-year-old saw that I was upset and came over to give me a hug. It sounds silly, but it was enough to make me think that maybe I wasn’t doing such a bad job after all. Remember that motherhood is a roller coaster. When you hit those lows, there is always a high coming. 

Motherhood is being depended on.

Leaving the hospital with a new baby is wild. Suddenly, you have a tiny human who relies on you to literally keep them alive! And they will keep relying on you in some way or another for the rest of their lives. This can be overwhelming, and that’s okay. Remember to rely on your support system when you need it. Nobody can do it all without some support of their own. 

You are not expected to have it all together. 

I know that it might seem like you are, but trust me, you are not expected to have it all together. Honestly, I think that having it all together is impossible. Different areas of your life will need different amounts of attention at different times. As long as you’re not giving up, it’s enough. 

Motherhood is all-encompassing.

Motherhood is not a job; it is a lifestyle. From the moment you bring your first baby home, it encompasses everything about your life. If you feel overwhelmed, you are normal! Just remember that all-encompassing doesn’t just mean the stressful parts. Motherhood is also being surrounded by the purest, unconditional love you will ever know. 

Motherhood is late nights and early mornings. 

Some days, you’re running on little to no sleep. If you need that nap while your babies are napping, TAKE THE NAP. You deserve it. 

Motherhood is messy. 

Real motherhood is a mess. It is stained onesies, muddy boots, paint-covered hands, and runny noses. The trick is to find beauty in the mess. If your house is in perfect shape and your kids have no dirt on their clothes, there’s a good chance that no memories are being made. Embrace the mess and jump in with your kids. If you’re messy, you’re doing it right. 

Motherhood is taking care of yourself.

Being a martyr in motherhood may seem like the noble way to go, but it actually doesn’t serve anyone. If your cup is empty, you have nothing left to give to your family. Take the time to take care of yourself. Whether that is a bath at the end of the day or a run by yourself, do what energizes you and brings you joy. If you don’t know what that is, take the time to try new things. You are worth it. 

Motherhood is sometimes stepping back.

Have you ever heard the saying, "The days are long, but the years are short"? When you’re in the middle of one of those long days, try stepping back. Try to see things from a different angle and remember that these difficult times will not last forever. Remember that you are working every day for a larger goal. 

Loving your kids is enough. 

This is one of my favorite affirmations in motherhood. There are so many little things that can make you doubt yourself and your parenting. Everyone will come in with tips and tricks and advice and reasons why you are not enough. But trust me when I tell you this: if at the end of the day, you are loving on your kids, it's enough. You are a great mother. Some days, all that you will have to offer your kids is love. Some days they won’t see that your rules and boundaries are from a place of love. Some days YOU might question whether you love them enough. You do.